No, that's not - that's not what I meant, I mean - we have a limited amount and I don't want to take from that limited amount when I don't need --

[ You don't have to punish yourself. Clint's on audio, but his lips tighten and thin, white. ] I killed people. I'm not going to argue with you about how that's not my fault. That has nothing to do with what I'm talking about.