We don't trust anyone, not with this, not with our thoughts. [Bacall speaks up first, softly.] Sherlock thinks it embarrassing, but mostly we're afraid of admitting we're just as human as anyone else, and that our great intellect can't fight this. We'd rather speak to you than them, we trust you far more than anyone else here besides Sherlock, but even back home, even more than our subordinates. After all, you can get through to Sherlock where we never could.

Bacall! [Mycroft is aghast, hissing, trying to cover the bird's beak with his hands and stop her from saying anymore, but she pecks his fingers harshly and continues.]

It was for the greater good, the safety of the entire nation and possibly the world, John, and we're sorry you were so upset by it. It was a necessary sacrifice on your part. We figured that you're a good soldier, and you'd carry on. We monitored you, kept a file on you during the interim, just to be sure how you were doing, if that is any reassurance.

[Terrible! Mycroft tries to stuff her face in his suit jacket, but she bites him again and continues.]

You're such a vital part of Sherlock's life, John Watson, we never have forgotten how much you mean to him and how much he means to you. You're part of our family, and you're under our protection as well.

[Good God, this was never going to end. Was his Heart truly this foolishly sentimental? Mycroft quickly butts in before she goes off and tells him he reminds them of Sherlock's old best friend or something.]

Why are you still going on about his faked death?