jumpthegun | IC Inbox (v1.0)

She's not the only one, thought. Royce is - more withdrawn than ever, Emily's only a child, and Alfie...I don't know. I'm doing my best, but he's a stoic man. [Which is something she likes about him, most of the time.]

And I'm freaked out. I'm super freaked out. But I'm not going to let it stop me from keeping on. Maybe - maybe all of this is happening because we're getting closer to an exit, and the town is trying to hold us back. Trying to make us hurt each other, break apart. Divide us.

If I needed help or wasn't in my right mind, I'd talk to someone. I'm fine. I just want to help.

[His heart beats a little faster for her compassion and dogged determination, but she's someone Alfie likes. John tamps down on that interest and just focuses on everything else.]

I'm not sure you're gonna have much luck with Royce, whatever you do. I know Alfie... he likes you. You could both probably use a nice distraction if that's anything you're interested in. He's gonna be the best on to rally those troops, get Royce talking and then Royce can talk to Tifa, and Alfie can help sort out Emily.

[Claire opens her mouth in surprise, then closes it, feeling her cheeks warm. So Alfie hasn't told John about the other night. It shouldn't have taken her aback, but it does, a little.]

Um. Yeah.

[She doesn't want to tip her hand - if Alfie wants to talk about her to John, that's his prerogative.]

I've left getting the group back together to Alfie. He's the best one to do - even if I wanted to help anyway, I'm too new. He's already been talking to Royce, I'm sure. He's doing well, all things considered.

[That hesitance and response say to John that's she's interested, in turn. That's... good. Good for Alfie and Claire both. They deserve something nice to share with one another.]

Alfie's better at hiding what he's feeling than a lot of people. Comes with the territory for his job, I imagine. Don't let him tell you he's a bad person, by the by. He does bad things, but that seems more like circumstances if what he's done since he arrived here is anything to go by. He likes to sound cool, like a bad boy, though.

Anyway, um... maybe you can try reaching out to Emily a little bit like you would for one of your patients? She's the one you might have the best luck with.

[She lets out a small laugh, more of an amused breath out than anything else.]

Alfie is who he is. There's good and bad there, but I'm not going to pretend he's a hero. [She's had enough of that at home. The self-sacrifice, martyr thing...which John seems to like doing, too.] But by all means, I don't think he tries to be a bad boy. [He's too old for that, John. It's not bravado; it's just the way he is.]

Yeah, I've talked to Emily a little. She's a sweet girl. And with Tifa too, but it was like pulling teeth.

He's complicated... and frustrating. Sometimes it's in a good way. [Sometimes he wants to punch the man.]

Anyway, I'm surprised you've had trouble talking with Tifa. The times I've traveled with her... well, she's not chatty, but she's usually nice enough for smalltalk.

Hm.

[Claire doesn't say anything else - she agrees, to an extent, but there's a lot she still has to think through herself before she can really come to any of these conclusions herself.]

Tifa, she - she's not doing well. I don't blame her for shutting down. The other night took a toll on their group.

[There's a pause.]

Alfie told me... She's got to know none of what happened was her fault, though. I wanted to kill Alfie and some of my other closest mates. I would've if I'd been able to get to them.

She might know it, but that doesn't prevent someone from feeling guilty. I don't know her well, I don't want to assume, but I imagine that it must be difficult to stop thinking about what she did, even if she wasn't responsible.

[Claire pauses, licks her lips as she thinks.]

I mean, even I can't stop thinking about what I wanted to do. It makes me sick.

[Yes, well, John wouldn't know anything about unwarranted guilt. Nope. there's a bit of a pause before he replies.]

Yeah. It wasn't a good thing last night. [To say the least.] I'm not sure it's done, either, with some people keeping those eyes.

[Claire reaches up to touch her face, fingers pressing against her eyelids for a moment. She'd tried to rub it off, but to no effect, obviously. She sighs.]

I...yeah. I still have them.

[Right. Lovely.]

I wonder if there's any pattern to that. I didn't manage to kill anyone last night, either, but mine are gone, so it can't be that. Are you a, uh... spiritual person?

To an extent. If you're asking me if I believe in God, the answer is yes. If you're asking if I'm a devout Catholic, the answer is no.

[She sighs.]

I don't know, John. I want to find sense in everything this town is inflicting upon us, but...maybe there isn't any to find.

Edited ((edited bc Alfie's eyes are still glowy!)) 2016-12-02 23:38 (UTC)

I think there is. I dunno what it is. But there's got to be... there can't just be no reason. Even if it's a bad reason, there's a reason. [Because John refuses to believe that most people people or the systems they design would be that cruel.]

I hope there is. I'd prefer it, to anything else I can think of. Everything else is just...Yeah. It hurts to think of. All of this - this is torture.

We'll figure out what it really is, Claire. I promise. It might just take a little while.

[She can't help the slight humorless chuckle that escapes her.]

I appreciate your optimism, John.

[He'll just let it falter with Alfie, Claire. Don't you worry.]

Hope is what'll get us through this, right? And more than a little bit of hard work. Happy to chip in with the first bit where I can.

[It's okay, she's kind of in the same boat.]

I think the hard work's more important.

[And now she's just teasing him.]

Well, I can help with that, too. Seems like it'll be more of a lift, though. Think we could just leave it to the youngest crowd? They're more strapping.

Now, now, are you calling yourself old?

Have you heard about the average age-range around here? I think it's something like 20.

Huh. I keep on stumbling upon the elderly population, then. Most the people I've met are older than that - or children. But I'll take your word for it!

[Maybe he's exaggerating a little.]

We've got a few at either end, but the bulk really do seem to skew to the under-30s. Anyway, please let me know if you need anything, Claire. I'll do my best to help. And keep as safe as you can out there.

You too, John.

[She hangs up.]

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