He'll be coming after you now that he knows for sure that you know, and now that he knows we're friends.
[And they are, even if he's so angry that John was stupid enough to confirm how deep their friendship went in front of that man. Angry for other reasons, selfish reasons. It's why he can't talk about it, he knows on some level that it's not really John's fault.]
According to a lot of people, that's physically impossible for me. Look, Buck, I don't have a lot of options here. He knows, he's gonna do what he's gonna do, regardless of whether or not I do anything. I'm not afraid of him, and maybe I should be, but I think between me, you, and Natasha, we can handle whatever he throws at us.
I didn't mean to tell him, Bucky. I'm sorry. It just sort of came out.
[In the heat of the moment, he hadn't been thinking about the tactics of the situation and whether or not he should pretend Bucky's no one to him.]
I know this is my fault, so I'll deal with the consequences. What's the worst he can do? Try to tell everyone I'm mental? I think they've had enough time around me to figure that out for themselves, one way or the other. And it's not like I'm not used to people calling me a liar and an idiot.
[He just doesn't get it. That's so far from the worst thing that Alexander Pierce can do, and it's terrifying. He can see flashes of memory, of pain, and his hands start shaking. Bucky's chest feels tight, like someone has a strap wrapped around him and is slowly closing it off bit by bit.]
What can I do? Tell me what I can do to help make you feel better about this. I'm sorry, Bucky. I don't know what to do to help you other than tell you I'm here for you.
[He just won't stop, will he? He's like Steve, doggedly pursuing, being a good person. Here to help, and all Bucky wants to do is shout at him for telling Pierce, for revealing their friendship. He knows if the Soldier is triggered, he knows... knows that Pierce will send him after John now. And even if the Soldier isn't triggered, Pierce will probably hunt him down and torture him to get at Bucky.
It'll all come down to blood in the end, John's blood on Bucky's hands. Just like all the other people's blood that's on his hands. He can see Steve's battered face in his mind's eyes, hear the whirr of the helicarrier.]
All right. Calm down, Bucky. Let's talk about something else. I'm meeting up with Sherlock in a couple of days. We'll be safer together. You won't have to worry.
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[And they are, even if he's so angry that John was stupid enough to confirm how deep their friendship went in front of that man. Angry for other reasons, selfish reasons. It's why he can't talk about it, he knows on some level that it's not really John's fault.]
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[Maybe... maybe in a few days. He needs a little time to rest here.]
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Don't be an idiot.
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[Oops, stupid voice to text really means he needs to be careful what comes out of his mouth. There's a brief pause, he didn't mean to let that fly.]
Forget it.
[Something to change the subject?]
Clint knows too.
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I didn't mean to tell him, Bucky. I'm sorry. It just sort of came out.
[In the heat of the moment, he hadn't been thinking about the tactics of the situation and whether or not he should pretend Bucky's no one to him.]
I know this is my fault, so I'll deal with the consequences. What's the worst he can do? Try to tell everyone I'm mental? I think they've had enough time around me to figure that out for themselves, one way or the other. And it's not like I'm not used to people calling me a liar and an idiot.
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I said forget it.
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What can I do? Tell me what I can do to help make you feel better about this. I'm sorry, Bucky. I don't know what to do to help you other than tell you I'm here for you.
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It'll all come down to blood in the end, John's blood on Bucky's hands. Just like all the other people's blood that's on his hands. He can see Steve's battered face in his mind's eyes, hear the whirr of the helicarrier.]
Stop it, shut up.
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I can't have your blood on my hands.
[And he's done with this conversation, just hanging up abruptly.]
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Please eat and sleep properly. You ran yourself ragged in those corridors. I'll talk to Natasha about what to do. Goodbye, Bucky.
[And then John hangs up. Politely.]