IC Inbox (v1.0)

[jumpthegun]

You've reached Dr. John Watson. Please leave a message.

Comments

[quadrangle]

[... Humans.]

PHYSICAL INTIMACY IS ONLY PART OF IT AND DOESN'T NEED TO BE SEXUAL. AT LEAST FOR US.
LOOK, I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, OK? IT'S JUST COMPLICATED.
AND I'M STILL BY THE SCHOOL AND HEADING EAST. I HAVE A LOT OF FOOD FROM THE CAFETERIA, WHICH SHOULD BE BETTER THAN EVERYTHING FROM THE CONVENIENCE STORE? SO THAT SHOULD HELP.

[jumpthegun]

[Fine. It's not like John has to justify the nature of his relationship with another man to a teenage alien. He's maybe a little sore, but that's what text is for.]

It should help a lot, especially if you're still planning on taking that over to the people in the Industrial area. Are you?

[quadrangle]

I AM YES. THAT'S WHAT I WAS PLANNING ON DOING BEFORE I GOT EATEN.
I MIGHT STOP BY THE CONVENIENCE STORE ON THE WAY THERE ANYWAY JUST IN CASE. MAYBE THERE'S SOMETHING USEFUL.

[jumpthegun]

If there's any jerky or salami you can find, that'll be some of the best things to take over. Dunno if trolls have cured meat, but it's something that'll last a good long while, regardless of conditions.

[quadrangle]

WE PROBABLY DO BUT WE CALL IT SOMETHING DIFFERENT? OR LOWBLOODS DO ANYWAY. I'LL KEEP AN EYE OUT.

[jumpthegun]

Is there some sort of divide between how the blood colors speak? Is it just sort of slang?

[quadrangle]

BLUEBLOODS USE RIDICULOUS ALIEN-SOUNDING TERMINOLOGY FOR SOME REASON, PROBABLY BECAUSE THEY'RE UNDER THE IMPRESSION IT MAKES THEM SOUND MORE INTELLIGENT AND SOPHISTICATED WHEN REALLY THEY'RE A BUNCH OF ARROGANT DOUCHETRUCKS WHO NEED TO GET THE FUCK OVER THEMSELVES.
BUT THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT. "CURED MEAT" IS ENOUGH TO GO OFF OF, SO I'LL LOOK FOR THAT.

[jumpthegun]

'Cured meat' is 'alien-sounding' to you? What would you call meat that had been salted and dried out?

[quadrangle]

I MEANT "SALAMI." I KNOW WHAT CURED MEAT IS, THANKS.
"JERKY" MEANWHILE HAPPILY RESIDES IN OUR LEXICON. IT'S GRUBJERKY. GET IT RIGHT.
AND UH

[He's noticing something a little alarming, now that he's actually stopped to think about it.]

WHO MENTIONED ANYTHING ABOUT BLOOD COLORS. I THOUGHT I DIDN'T EXPLAIN THAT TO YOU. DID I EXPLAIN THAT TO YOU? I CAN'T REMEMBER.

[jumpthegun]

Grubs are insects. We definitely don't have jerky for that. Closest you might get is canned crab, or something. that's basically a sea insect.

It wasn't you. That Vriska girl and Terezi talked about it, though. Different spectrums. Why?

[That's a rather suspicious concern, Karkat.]

[quadrangle]

A SEA INSECT, REALLY?

[You are losing so many cool points, John.]

AND UH. NO REASON. HAHAHA. YEAH I GUESS IT WOULD MAKE SENSE FOR THEM TO BRING IT UP.
THEY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ELSE ABOUT IT DID THEY.

[jumpthegun]

[Tone is lost in translation here, Karkat.]

Yeah, they're pretty cool. Not much for the canned stuff, but I do like fresh crab. Lobster's better, though. Unless you have some sort of special names for those. Eight-legged seadwellers?

[John's starting to connect some dots here.]

They mentioned there are sometimes blood mutations.

[It' a lie, but they'll just see where Karkat takes that.]

[quadrangle]

[SO MANY COOL POINTS. GONE FOREVER. He'll express this in a moment, but first—]

OK CAN YOU MAYBE EXPLAIN WHY THE FUCK THAT WOULD EVER COME UP IN CONVERSATION. WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY PLAYING AT, WAS IT VRISKA OR TEREZI?? NO WHAT AM I SAYING, OF COURSE IT WAS TEREZI.
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT ISN'T IMPORTANT. IN FACT CONSIDER IT STRUCK FROM THE RECORD ENTIRELY AND LET'S GO BACK TO DISCUSSING CRABS, WHICH WE DO IN FACT HAVE!
MY LUSUS WAS ONE. I MEAN NOT YOUR NORMAL EARTH-SIZED CRABS, HE WAS BIGGER THAN A HUMAN ADULT AND BIPEDAL. SO CAN YOU MAYBE NOT TALK ABOUT EATING THEM? THAT WOULD BE GREAT, THANKS YOU INSENSITIVE DOUCHE.

[jumpthegun]

Sorry, I didn't realize.

But I do remember her saying something about a particular troll she knew, now you bring it up. One with a blood mutation that might well get him killed if anyone found out. We were just talking about the hemospectrum and how the caste system works. [Not a bit of this happened, but it's a lot easier to lie in text.]

Karkat, if she was talking about you, you should know she said she thought it was dumb.

[quadrangle]

[... oh.]

[Karkat doesn't respond for a long, long time, long enough that John could probably be forgiven for assuming he isn't going to respond at all. It doesn't take a genius to realize that it was his own prying into the aubject that had helped with those final leaps in logic (nice job breaking it, Past Karkat!), but seriously, what the fuck. Why had Terezi mentioned it at all? Because it didn't matter anymore? But—]

YOU CAN'T TELL ANYONE. I MEAN IT.

[jumpthegun]

[And there it is. It seems so simple, really.]

Won't tell a soul. It really isn't anything the non-trolls here would judge you for, though, mate. And it's nothing that makes you less valuable as a person, regardless of what your society says. You know that, right?

[quadrangle]

I KNOW. I MEAN I KNOW PEOPLE WON'T GIVE ME SHIT ABOUT IT UNLESS THEY'RE BEING ASSHOLES ON PRINCIPLE, BUT IT'S STILL NOT SOMETHING I WANT SPREAD AROUND. LIKE WHAT IF SOME TROLL WHO *DOES* CARE TURNS UP AND FINDS OUT ABOUT IT BECAUSE HUMANS DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY IT'S SUCH A BIG DEAL? OR SOMETHING ELSE LIKE THAT, I DON'T KNOW.
IT'S BETTER IF AS FEW PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE KNOW ABOUT IT. THAT'S ALL.

[jumpthegun]

[He wonders if he should come clean and decides not to. Some lies are better kept, and they're not hurting anything.]

I understand. It's nothing relevant for any conversations I can think of that I'll be having with other people who aren't already trolls. With the way the Admin adjusts our blood, anyway, I'm not sure anything apart from 'type' is really in question. And that's our human spectrum, not the troll kind.

[quadrangle]

OK. GOOD.

[Fuck, this shouldn't still scare him. How long has it been since it had even mattered? But he's been jumpy and on edge for days now, and there's only one thing in his life that had ever bothered him that much, so...]

DOCTOR STRANGE KNOWS, BY THE WAY. AND DAVESPRITE, BUT THAT SORT OF GOES WITHOUT SAYING? BUT IF YOU NEED TO MENTION IT TO STRANGE FOR WHATEVER HUMAN DOCTOR-RELATED REASON, IT'S FINE.

[jumpthegun]

I'll keep that in mind, but do my best to keep conversation on it to a minimum, all right?

[quadrangle]

ALRIGHT. THANKS, JOHN.

[jumpthegun]

No problem, and take care, especially in those tunnels, Karkat.

[quadrangle]

YOU BE CAREFUL OUT THERE TOO. TALK TO YOU LATER.